Hello guys! Today we will talk about how to be a true modern gentleman and let me just say; it’s not about owning an expensive sartorial-made-suit or a vintage Breitling diamond watch.
Being a real modern gentleman has nothing to do with money or social status, and it isn’t something you can turn on and off like a switch. It’s a lifestyle. It’s your day by day behaviour, like protecting the weak and defenseless, showing compassion and mercy, speaking the truth, being truthful with yourself and courteous to others, especially women.
As we all know trends come and go, as do friends and lovers, but one thing that remains constant is the notion that we as men should aspire to be gentlemen. And we should, as a real gentleman is a noble person with high morals and ideals, honest and charitable, a proper human being.
1 Style and appearance
A true gentleman doesn’t need to follow trends, he is not attached to a certain look. He knows that he’s unique but most of all that it’s all about attitude and how you carry yourself.
He is naturally stylish and always dressed for the occasion, a guy who stands out from the crowd effortlessly. His elegance is subtle, as he knows that ” less is more” and is fully aware that acquiring an expensive three-piece suit and partying in a private club will not earn you the right to be classed as a gentleman.
He’s well dressed ”by default,” and would be as elegant and stylish in a pair of jeans and a T-shirt as he would be in a suit. You can buy fashion, but you can’t buy style. The same is true of “form” – it’s something you instinctively have or have to learn, but definitely not something that you can buy or rent.
He is confident and mature, he doesn’t need the acceptance of the whole pack and doesn’t care about what people think about him.
A gentleman is not a copy, he’s one of a kind and so is his personal style.
2 Professional achievements
A gentleman is not restricted by limits. When faced with challenges he does not give up but works harder, smarter, towards finding solutions, transforming”problems” into solvable situations. He is in control, but not afraid to learn and ask for advice. For him, correctness is important as he will always take responsibility for the things he does. Modest and kind, a gentleman is a true inspiration for others; a person that will never let you down, but fight till the end for you and the common good, challenging even the status quo if necessary.
He is the ultimate leader: empathetic, diplomatic, charismatic and self-aware. He is a very good listener, respects his colleagues and his workplace where he leads by example.
A gentleman is never afraid to fail. For him, failing is nothing but a way to get better. He knows that mistakes are there to teach us something, that failure is inevitable and that the way you will respond to it will shape your future and in the end your success. Event + Response = Outcome. Playing it safe, settling for second best, not trying to achieve something because of fear of failure is not an option. Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
By the way, a true gentleman will never argue with you, he will state his point of view, calmly, civilized, preferring discussions over fights.
3 Social status
A gentleman prefers to be judged on reputation instead of his success and wealth; you will rarely see him showing off the label of his flawless suits. For him, the sentimental value will always prevail over what society deems as priceless.
He will never display opulence, talk about how big his house is or how many women he’s been with. Privacy is important for him, as we all know “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell”. For him diversity deserves to be celebrated not oppressed, we are all equals, so you will never see him flashing around his superiority, making you feel that you don’t count, or don’t belong. He is considerate and well mannered towards others, he will always talk the talk and walk the walk.
4 Friends and family
A gentleman knows the importance of true friendship; he will help you no matter what, without any judgment whatsoever or something to gain. He will be there for you even when you’re not. You will hear friends describing him as a good listener, the most generous person in the group, and a go-to-person for advice and comfort.
For him, ”family” is important and will always include his friends that he will defend against bullies and social injustice. He has a small and diverse group of friends because for him quality is more important than quantity, and moral values will always win against social backgrounds.
He respects his parents, grandparents, and in-laws and would not hesitate to ask them for help and advice when he needs a wise opinion. Being a good son, husband, father, a good friend means being supportive, loyal, respectful, helpful and a protector if needed, and a real gentleman knows this.
Is chivalry dead? Maybe for a regular dude, for a true gentleman is one of the most important ideas on which his behavior leans on.
Chivalry is the act of showing courtesy towards women and the term is synonymous with being a gentleman.
A gentleman conforms to a high standard of propriety: he holds the door for people; he will give up his seat and take off his coat in a second to a lady on a cold evening. He will always be gallant, courteous, polite, respectful toward his gal and noble to everyone around him
A gentleman is a person with a strong moral compass. He’ll have principles and morals and will not move away from those at any cost. It’s not about what the world can do for you but what YOU can do for the word the and the people around you.
Some practical tips:
- Be Presentable.
Maintain proper hygiene.
Wear clothes that fit your body well.
Groom yourself well.
Have a firm handshake.
Avoid any offensive actions in public.
Make polite conversation.
Don’t talk too much about yourself
Travel as much as you can, broaden your horizons
- Find time for reading, be informed
- Know the best florist in town.
Never suggest chemsex on the first date.
Will be unafraid to hire people more talented than himself.
Only parades his “mankles” between the months of June and September.
Will not immediately forget someone’s name the very second they told it to him.
Will never uses “boss”, “mate” or “pal”.
Uses his mobile only when he needs it, not as a social crutch.
Drink enough to have fun, but not so much as to become a figure of fun.
Will never, ever go for a spray-on tan.
Never “ghosts” (or ends relationships by disappearing).
- He knows that “Netflix and chill” is a state of mind.
In the end…
Just do your best, a gentleman is not a flawless guy but one that tries his best, always pushing himself towards doing the right thing.
Am I a gentleman? I hope so. What I know for sure its that I wanna be a better person and if this means to be a gentleman count me in, and if I’m seen as one, let me just say, I’m proud as hell.
As I’ve read this article again I see that A gentleman is like a super-hero, fighting the good fight and being there when needed. Was Clark Kent a gentleman? Definitely! So the question is are you ready to take the cape and be a gentleman? Hope so!
See ya next time!
Pics: Pinterest, GQ